(Originally by Flanders & Swann)

Miller's Dale for Tideswell,
Kirby Muxloe,
Mow Cop and Scholar Green.

No more will I go to Blandford Forum and Mortehoe.
On the slow train from Midsomer Norton and Mumby Road.
No churns, no porter, no cat on a seat,
At Chorlton-cum-Hardy or Chester-le-Street.
We won't be meeting again
On the Slow Train.

I'll travel no more from Littleton Badsey to Openshaw;
At Long Stanton I'll stand well clear of the doors no more.
No whitewashed pebbles, no Up and no Down,
From Formby Four Crosses to Dunstable Town.
I won't be going again
On the Slow Train.

On the Main Line and the Goods Siding,
The grass grows high.
At Dog Dyke, Tumby Woodside,
And Trouble House Halt.

The sleepers sleep at Audlem and Ambergate.
No passenger waits on Chittening platform or Chesley Hay.
No one departs, no one arrives,
From Selby to Goole, from St Erth to St Ives.
They've all passed out of our lives
On the Slow Train.